i miss the concrete as much as i thought it impossible, i find myself vacant here in all but wonder, i encounter great savagery and idiot tyrants and this is what my world has become, a circus of this, of these, i dream of spiders and cruel women and i awake to roaches and emptiness.…

i find that i have lost some things and my teeth are all rotting, my gut is wide with excess and though i trimmed the fat from my habits the flesh will not fade. my blood is all washed out and i sleep in doom and sweat and i know, i know you find this…

and the demons said when i woke up this morning, “wash yo hair in the sink today!” and i did, and i did, with my head upside down touching the basin with the shampoo whirlpool and the sucking sound at the bottom of the drain… so i did, and i did, and then i went…