words

this is far too complicated,
there are too many holes in the world
through which to fall
and not by any means,
a reasonable number of exits
yet so few ways out of the tunnels
we daily dig, deeper and deeper
the axiom of loneliness
closer to the core,
expel this theory,
find some approach to quiet
these terrible inner world demons
that spit and grin and chew
the tangled cords at the base
of my neck, burrowing through
the cerebellar center of my being.

do not wake them, christ
if it can be helped,
do not disturb their fiery lope
behind my eyes, pulling wires
to focus here then there,
a complicated series of pulleys
and levers to control the arms
and legs and head,
an old projector spraying
technicolor, faded moving pictures
of sordid fears and paranoid wonder,
a phantasmagoria of fever worlds
where all that I know to be terrible
is real, and all that I know to be real
is terrible.

-S.C. Martinez